Name: Title: The impact of ethnicity on my family Subject: Due Date: Growing up, my family consisted of my mother, father, and my three brothers. My father was of German decent and my mother was of Irish. There was a stigma attached to being a German American back in the late 1940’s and as a result, my father would have nothing to do with this German heritage. He changed his name from Willie to William and as a great disappointment to my grandparents, refused to learn the German language. Even with his attempts to keep his ethnicity out of his life, my father retained many of the German traits of his parents. He is extremely hardworking and thrifty.
The thought of going into dept makes him physically sick to his stomach. He would never own a credit card. To make a major purchase such as a car or appliance, he would take a 2 nd and sometimes a 3 rd job so he could pay cash for the items. I like to think that I inherited my father’s work ethics. But I know for a fact that I don’t have an ounce of his thrifty ways, nor do my daughter. I miss the German foods that my Grandmother used to make.
Now that she is gone, I wish I had some of her recipes. The only German foods I can make are potato pancakes and German Potato salad, which my daughters love, or at least they say they do so they don’t hurt my feelings. I hardly knew my mothers parents. They both died before I started kindergarten. My grandfather loved beer and died of cirrhosis.
I suppose that this could go along with his Irish ethnicity. My mother is a strong catholic and had plans to become a nun before she met my father. As long as I can remember, my mother would give up a pleasure in her life and spend time praying for something to happen or not happen to one of her sons. Examples are: . She gave up wine and prayed that I wouldn’t be drafted during the Viet Nam war. I received a medical exemption for a back problem…
She gave up between meal snacks and prayed that my brother, Kevin would marry his live-in girlfriend. Kevin is in his mid 40 s now and is still living with Patty. Mom doesn’t pray for this anymore since Kevin is the only of her 4 sons that hasn’t been divorced yet. Besides her strong Catholic beliefs and her ‘suffering’ and praying for her sons, the other Irish trait I see in my mother is that if she was dying of some horribly painful disease, the most you might hear out of her is that ‘I’m feeling a little under the weather today’. She would never admit she was sick or that she needs to see a doctor. I see this trait in my brothers, myself, and 2 of my 3 daughters.
My 3 rd daughter on the other hand can drive you insane with her moaning. I can also thank my mother that I can make a pretty good meal of corn beef and cabbage. Growing up, my family was very emotionless. There was rarely any touching, hugging, or kissing within my family. Even verbal expressions of love were rare.
I attribute this to a combination of both the German and Irish influences. I married a girl who came from a strong Italian background. Both her mother and father were of both of heritage and this heritage was an important part of their everyday lives. As I became more and more involved in my wife’s family, life as I knew it started coming to an abrupt end. I had never witnessed such a ‘loud’ family, never saw so much physical displays of emotion and love, never saw so many men cry, and never tasted such great food. As my family became more and more involved with these strange people, I started to see the positive effects of ’emotion’ blending into their lives.
Sadly, after 25 years my marriage ended in divorce. But, you can still see the positive effects in my family from blending of the Italian ethnicity with it’s German-Irish Ethnicity. I don’t see any one strong ‘ethnicity’ coming out in any of my 3 daughters. They are a blending of all three backgrounds. Two like Italian food while one hates it, but all 3 like my German and Irish cooking (or they just tell me that to make me happy).
They ” re not as emotional as my ex-wife’s family yet they ” re a lot more emotional than my family is today. None of them have the strong religious faith of my mother or my ex-wife’s mother. Both my ex-wife’s and my grandparents were born in their ethnic homelands. I see that with my daughters, who are the third generation born in America, their ethnicity is blending out of their lives.