Boosting Your Confidence

Boost Your Self Confidence

Contents

Confidence tips that work………………………………………………………………………………………………….3 Social settings can help you find your confidence…………………………………………………………………4 Working women can boost their confidence………………………………………………………………………..5 Your sex appeal can be your confidence booster…………………………………………………………………..5 Accepting the truth – A great step to building your confidence……………………………………………….6 Alternative self confidence techniques you can experiment with……………………………………………7 Boosting your confidence during a job search………………………………………………………………………8 Building back your confidence after a layoff……………………………………………………………………….9 Confidence boosters for the new college grad…………………………………………………………………….10 Don’t compare yourself and get your confidence down……………………………………………………….11 Forget about your fears and start developing your self confidence………………………………………..12 Getting rid of confidence crushers…………………………………………………………………………………….13 Great ways to regain your lost confidence………………………………………………………………………….14 How to condition your mind for success……………………………………………………………………………15 How To Develop An Amazing Self-confidence………………………………………………………………….16 Learn to let go and build back your confidence…………………………………………………………………..17 Practical ways to boost your self-confidence………………………………………………………………………18 Procrastination will never make you self-confident…………………………………………………………….19 Some quick self confidence boosters…………………………………………………………………………………20 The art of staying positive………………………………………………………………………………………………..21 The habits of confident people………………………………………………………………………………………….22 The Key To Finding Your Inner Confidence………………………………………………………………………23 The top secrets to building better confidence……………………………………………………………………..24 Walking that thin line between confidence and arrogance……………………………………………………25 Ways to boost your child’s confidence………………………………………………………………………………26

2

Confidence tips that work

It’s a myth that winners don’t require any motivational or confidence tips. They require good selfassurance tips frequently to keep up their motivational level. From the time you get your confidence tips make sure you apply them in order to transform the existing quality of life. Confidence is necessary to achieve success in life. Some effective confidence tips must be followed if you genuinely want to gain accomplishment in your work. So how do you build your confidence that will work for you in any situation? Initially, make an effort to spend time with confident people. Their vigor and strength is so stirring that you will surely feel yourself more powerful just by listening to their talk. To build confidence it is vital that you are in the midst of self-assuring people. This will help you derive great confidence from them. All you have to do is ask them for good confidence tips. Secondly, make sure that you find a mentor. All successful people have mentors in life, those who can efficiently guide you, advise you and also offer some confidence tips. The person can help you considerably and you can taste success more quickly than you ever imagined. Two minds are always better than one. Try to understand that confidence is just a feeling. Think about all the situations where you have felt confident. Such positive thoughts can make you confident in future. Sit down for a few minutes everyday and analyze the happenings during your day. Imagine all the things that make you feel certain. This can boost your morale and make you even more poise. List all your reasons to be confident. Try and list all the qualities that have helped you to be confident today. Include your victories, skills and also mention about your goals. After you have done this you will see how powerful your analysis can be. It will make you feel even more confident. The most important confidence tip can be preparation. Continuous preparation makes you perfect and you attain confidence. Have you ever watched a sportsman playing effortlessly or stars performing live on stage? How do they give such a flawless performance? Preparation makes you more and more perfect. It is necessary that you keep honing your skills to achieve perfection and this automatically will augment your level of confidence. Self-comparison is another key to enhance your confidence. Learn to compare your progress in life with respect to your previous results. Look at other successful people and learn not to measure just your success. When you put in more efforts on the daily improvement of your individual skills and capabilities you can grow very rapidly and your confidence will surge. Confidence without capability is a perilous combination. It is necessary that you only engage in self-comparison when you are assessing your development. By doing this you will make it easier when the going gets rough and your proficiency will grow day-by-day. Reading these confidence tips will surely make you feel better. But remember that you must use these confidence tips to see results. It’s necessary to implement all these tips in your routine life to derive more success. So start using these tips right away.

3

Social settings can help you find your confidence

Many of us are great and confident people among our own circle of friends and family. Then why is it that our confidence level diminishes when we are among another community or unfamiliar people? Socializing is good but many of us fail to enjoy it. Our minds are occupied with thoughts such as what others think about us, the tone of our skin, the hair, your outward appearance, the list is endless. There are people who get so conscious and petrified about how the world looks at them. Well, let me tell you, the world looks at you the way you portray yourself to them. Today, not only adults but teenagers and children too, are finding it hard to believe in themselves and feel confident about who and what they are. Firstly, we all should learn to love and appreciate ourselves. It’s okay if we are not perfect, rather no one is perfect. We all have a distinctive quality that we can be proud of. There are a few people that lose confidence due to their own thoughts and assumptions, while some lose their confidence because of what someone else said to them. If someone made fun of your curly or wavy hair does not mean you start disliking it. It is that person who is insensitive and making some silly comments. Why should we give importance to such people who hardly matter in our life? A person who frequently passes comments about others is someone who lacks something himself and is only trying to console himself by making others feel miserable about themselves. Taking the words of such people to heart is utter foolishness. Instead, look at your positive and good points and highlight them. Just because you are size zero, does not mean you give up wearing good clothes out of embarrassment. Instead, choose those outfits that compliment your body and feel confident about yourself when walking down the street. It is fine if you are not able to follow the latest trend. Instead of feeling bad, it is nice to set your own style by doing things that goes well with you. Figure out your own skills and qualities and work on them. This will automatically help you boost your confidence. Stop being embarrassed at the comments passed by others. If you know what you are doing is right, go ahead with it without bothering yourself of what others will say or do. Concentrating on what others are doing and how you can be like them will always keep you behind. Instead, work on yourself and boost your confidence to something unusual and different from the rest. Do not assume things and stop yourself from trying out new things in life. Remember, failure has been a part of everyone’s life and we all need to learn to deal with it. Failures will tell you where you need to improvise. Being prepared to take the risk is a sign of a confident person. Instead of thinking and focusing on things you can’t do, it is best to work on things you can do and achieve. Small achievements in life bring satisfaction and pep up your confidence always. The next time you are out in public, feel and tell yourself that you are no less than anyone in the world and have your own qualities which you should be proud of. Feel this and you would see a change in the way the world sees you.

4

Working women can boost their confidence

Having confidence in the long term means having faith in oneself and one’s choices. However, you do need to boost your confidence a little every day to keep your long-term confidence strong. Boosting self-confidence is a common goal shared by most working women. The fact is that most professional women do not have very high self-confidence even if they appear to do so. There is an inner conflict going within them with their ‘inner critic’; that small nagging voice that says that you are not good enough, strong enough or smart enough. It has a strangle hold on just about everyone. This voice is in fact not subtle but is loud and menacing and can shatter your confidence. As a working woman you can try some of these strategies to boost your confidence and start feeling better right away. Increase physical activity – If you use the lift take the stairs instead or walk up rather than use the escalator. When stopping your car park it some distance further and walk down from there. Start cycling. Physical exercise is good for the body and mind. It has tremendous benefits like clearing up the brain and the lungs, defusing anger and frustration and building up your strength and endurance. It is going energize you. You will look more attractive and beautiful because energy will enhance your appearance imparting a healthy glow to your looks and add a spring to your step. Therefore always be active. Be careful how you dress – What you wear is what is first visible to others. Your clothes and the way you dress is a reflection of your aesthetic sense, taste and style. If you put on inappropriate clothes people will most likely be doubtful about your sense of judgment and ability to handle important matters. While dressing you must ask yourself how you would like others to perceive you. Think of the people you want to impress. All this is not about making a fashion statement. This is about what is appropriate and effective in a particular environment. There are four things for you to remember about your dressing. The first is the fit of your clothes, then cleanliness, your shoes and the smile you wear. These are vital factors. Whatever clothes you buy whether they are designer clothes, high street or any other you must ensure that they fit you well. Your dresses should always be clean and there should not be any pulls, missing buttons or stray threads hanging around. Your shoes should be decent, well soled and polished. And you must always wear a bright smile to project a positive image. Do breathing exercises – Stand straight and breathe deeply. Search for peace inside you. With life’s pace being so hectic, peace is a scarce commodity, as people are pressed for time, overloaded with information multitasking all the time, living a suffocating life. To get out of this try to focus on whom you are. Breathe from your belly like babies. You can do this anywhere like in the lift, toilet, or even in the midst of people to calm yourself and increase your focus. Mastering these techniques will boost your confidence as you surge forward in your career as a working woman.

Your sex appeal can be your confidence booster

Sex appeal can make you stand out of the crowd and come across as the most happening person around. Confidence plays an important role in the dating game as well as otherwise. A

5

person who can carry himself smartly is the one who is impressive and looked upon. You need not be a person with perfect figure or physique to stand apart from the crowd. You only need to learn to highlight your best qualities and create a style for self. If you are confident from within, it shows in the way you walk, talk and present yourself. Learn to recognize what goes best on you. Once you know your strong points you can flaunt them. Before you step out of your home, look into the mirror and tell yourself that you are looking gorgeous and out of this world. Step out with confidence and feel that you are amongst the best looking in the town. Know that you deserve the best and you will get it. Pamper yourself and that will help you boost your sex appeal and indirectly the confidence in you as well. Buy yourself the best clothes. Ladies, paint your nails, go to the parlor for a makeover, do all that, and it will make you look and feel the best. Go for styles that show the best in you. You can take tips and suggestions from your friends or experts to make you look even better. When people start noticing your sex appeal, your confidence will instantly get a boost. However, make sure you do not get overconfident, as that will only drive people away from you. If you treat yourself well, then others will do so. If you start counting yourself among good looking people and treat yourself well by keeping your self respect, people will treat you the same way. If you come across as unconfident and a person with no substance, you would not been seen as an impressive personality. Personality is not about having a fair or clear skin, being fat or thin. It is all about carrying yourself with confidence. This confidence comes when you start dressing well, and start believing that you have something appealing that can attract people. How you feel about yourself also depends on what kind of people you surround yourself with. Spending more time among people who are negative or make you feel low and ugly will certainly make you like that. It is always good to be among chirpy and positive people who can boost your confidence. Don’t dress the way the trend is at the moment, but choose something that will make you comfortable and look hot. Create you own style statement. It is necessary to spend time doing things that give you joy. This will make you feel happy from within and will automatically reflect on your face, making it glow. Thus, to enhance your looks it is necessary for you to look great from within. Learn to be approachable and open up with friends. Staying aloof will only make you go unnoticed. Develop confidence in your speech, walk, and everything that you do. To come across as appealing you need to love yourself, polish your personality, and be confident. Taking care of these things will make a tremendous positive change in your life.

Accepting the truth – A great step to building your confidence

“Self-confidence gives you the freedom to make mistakes and cope with failure without feeling that your world has come to an end or that you are a worthless person.” The world respects Abraham Lincoln, but did you know that he had dabbled in two business ventures and failed in them? A déjà vu repeated when he lost eight different elections that

6

resulted in a nervous breakdown. What transpired later is a known fact to everyone. He was designated as the president of United States. Sounds like a saga out of a fairy tale, isn’t it? But, yes his story of absolute confidence portrays how you need to accept things and keep moving on in life. You must hold your dreams tight and eventually you will see them come true. This may be an anecdote that must have conquered the minds of many. If you study Lincoln’s conquest in his search of success, you can see that he never lost control over his confidence. Yes, you may argue that he was subjugated by a nervous breakdown. But it was not the end of road for him. He recuperated from his state and went on to make history. His astounding success was mainly due to the fact that he accepted the truth of his failures. Every individual, irrespective of being successful or not, has to accept his imperfections. This can be the biggest gateway for his success. You need to realize that there is absolutely no harm in accepting the truth about your deficiencies. We all have been given an opportunity to work on our discrepancies. Rather than showcasing an impertinent attitude, we must make a keen effort to hone our skills in the areas we lack in. Suppose you have an important presentation at your workplace. You have painstakingly done your homework and are confident enough that you will deliver an implausible presentation. All goes well except for a few critics who don’t seem to be much impressed by your way of thinking. They give you their feedback. Now, this situation can make anybody furious, since you have put in a lot of hard work anticipating high credits from the senior officials of the company. The essential thing that you need to do here is stay cool. Once you are alone, analyze what went wrong. Don’t make a negative impression of people who have commented on your presentation. It might completely put you off and you may never regain the confidence for future endeavors. Try ways of how you can improve yourself on the points you seem to lack. Work on the same and make an attempt to explain the reworked facts to your seniors. Well, at the end of the day you might be proud enough to leave your workplace after garnering accolades and praises! It’s all about how you put your mind in the thinking process. Accepting the truth will only boost your self-esteem and thereby build your confidence level. Rather than possessing an egocentric outlook, it’s good to accept the ground realities of your personality. After all, magic never happens with magicians alone, it can even happen to you, and that too, all in a day’s work.

Alternative self confidence techniques you can experiment with

Self-confidence plays an important role in every individual’s life. It is a key to success and can earn respect and appreciation. Confidence is a feeling of trust to believe in your own potentials and abilities. It is what it takes to accomplish a task successfully. Fearing things around you will only bring failure and disappointment and so it is essential to overcome your fears and develop self-confidence. There are a few people who are very self confident, but do not succeed in life. There are many who possess self-confidence naturally, which they use effectively in whatever they do. Initially, there were no such techniques to help people boost their confidence. However, today the scenario is different and one can gain confidence with the help of hypnosis. Yes, it is true that with hypnosis you can learn and build a sense of confidence. Hypnosis is nothing but a state of

7

mind that let’s you focus on something specific, while you relax. With the help of hypnosis, you can guide your mind to be confident. Your subconscious mind is an inner net working place, where long term changes could be brought about even without your knowledge. You can either practice hypnosis yourself to look confident or opt for a trained professional, who will help you gain confidence with the latest techniques. Once your mind is focused, the expert will guide you to be confident and let you practice few exercises to gain a confident life. The success rate of hypnosis changing people’s lives for the better is far more than you can imagine. So, you should try out these techniques, where experts guide you to follow and bring about the desired change. Hypnosis is actually an easy and trustworthy process and a great alternative to build your selfconfidence. Another alternative is changing your perception. Yes, it makes a big difference at the way you look at life. The world looks at you, the way you portray yourself to them. If you feel confident, it will be shown in your actions. Everything seems hard at the first time. However, the moment you start practicing it, all becomes easier. To build self-confidence is just the same. You may find it hard to develop it at first, but once you gain confidence and have it in you, you can change the world around you. Fearing rejection or failure will certainly make you unsuccessful. However, taking risks and being bold would turn your failure to success. Remember, your failures would guide you further to take a step ahead and help you work and improvise on your weaknesses. A selfconfident person is always ready to take risk and at the same time is prepared to accept both failure and success. Being realistic will help you accept the failures easily. Trust me, there is no person who has been successful without tasting failure. Thus, learn to take the risk and you can move ahead in life. Instead of focusing more on your weaknesses, it is best to focus on your strengths and see how you can make them to work. Each individual has a distinctive quality that can make him/her stand apart in the crowd. You need to realize it and polish it to achieve your goals. Each achievement will boost your confidence urging you to do even better every time. Try loving yourself and feel good about what you are. Change the perception of life, which will help you progress and develop self-confidence.

Boosting your confidence during a job search

If you have become jobless you are bound to have unruly thoughts capturing your mind. Questions like: When will I hit upon a job? What if no one will employ me? Till then who will pay my bills? And the list is endless. Job hunters can be typically classified into three basic categories: people entering the job market immediately after graduation, people who are at present jobless and of course people who are working but desire a job change. If your thoughts and feelings are similar to these, you are not alone. Job search can be a scary experience, but it’s also a point to build your self-assurance throughout your discovery of a new job. Job search mainly means that you must have a good confidence level. Accept the weaknesses that you have and try to improve the same. Prepare a plan of action in your search for a job.

8

If you haven’t searched for an occupation since very long time then most likely you may be apprehensive and scared to walk in for an interview. In certainty, you are simply inundated by all the steps you need to take in order to find a job. It is a well-known fact that, you have tough competition, but don’t let that jolt you. Your center of attention should be on things that you can do. Think for yourself and create an influential door-opener resume, practice for the interview, foreseeing every question you can actually think of. So did you ever think that hunting for a job would be pretty easy? A job probably won’t occur immediately. You have to be patient and put in a lot of time before you can garner the benefits. To gain more success in your hunt, prepare a powerful resume, and build a network group who can give you good contacts about job vacancies and potentially provide you good assistance. Nothing builds self-confidence more rapidly than practicing the questions generally asked in interviews. Do your effective homework. Practice conducting mock interview sessions that might give you a great level of confidence. Before an interview you can try and do this practice exercise. Most companies expect candidates to have adequate expertise in speaking English. In case you are having difficulty with the language try practicing at home. Don’t lack your confidence at the time of interview. Speak in an assuring manner. When you go for an interview make sure that you look good and presentable. Wear clothes that can give a striking impression about you. Clothes can define your personality and thereby raise your confidence level. Your look overall, should reflect self-assurance and capability. Try not being nervous in front of the interviewer. Think that you are perfectly capable for the job and have a positive attitude. Also after the interview, make sure you follow up regarding your feedback. In the end, your confidence is critical to your triumph during the job interview. If you need a boost, as we all do from time to time, put into practice some of these secrets prior to and during your job interview. Sometimes these small tips can make you find the perfect job that you were always on the lookout for.

Building back your confidence after a layoff

If you have become unemployed recently your first instinct may be to take your layoff as a paid vacation and use it to relax a bit. On the other hand you may become morose and want to find solace in drinks, tobacco, food or other bad habits. Or you may become resigned and park yourself before your TV all the time. You must understand that all these activities are self defeating and dangerous and can quickly put you on the path to financial ruin and family problems or may even lead to bankruptcy. However, remember all is not lost and you can still raise your self-esteem and improve your family morale by doing some very pro-active things and prepare yourself for the difficult times ahead.

9

The first thing that you should do is improving your look. Get a new haircut, hair color or make up. Buy some new clothing. Or better still, do all of them. Looking good will make you feel more confident. Pay attention to your posture. Take care how you stand and move. All this does not only send a message to the outside world but in fact it is meant to be a message to your own self. When you don’t care about the way you look, walk, or move, it means that you consider that you do not matter. Therefore, you must behave and act as if you do matter and like you are honoring yourself. Self-confidence and self-respect co-exist. You need to be prepared to do things that can help you gain and retain your self-respect. At the same time you must be willing to respect others. This is important because may need to cut people who do not allow you to feel positive about yourself out of your life. Depending on the people you accept in your life, your self-confidence can either flourish or evaporate. Make sure that you keep yourself surrounded by people who display through their actions that they care about you and that your interests are close to their hearts. Don’t compare yourself with other people or measure yourself by other people’s standards. Appreciate your values and learn to love yourself. You are unique in the universe. Everyone has a value and can offer something to the world. Introspect and identify your personal mission and purpose in life. The best way to build up your confidence is to do something that you are passionate about and that which involves using your unique abilities and talent. You can never have confidence in yourself if you do not like the work you do or if you are not competent for doing your job. Taken positively, your layoff could actually be a blessing in disguise. It can provide you with an opportunity for reevaluating your life and deciding upon the direction that you would like heading in. If you are unsure how to begin you can get help by taking a personality test that is offered free by a number of websites on the Internet and find out which can be the best career path for you to pursue. In the meanwhile, don’t remain idle. Involve yourself in some meaningful work without delay even as a volunteer. Do volunteer work to let people and organizations benefit from your expertise. You may not be able to overcome the trauma of being laid off overnight. However, to regain your self-confidence you just need to find out what you want and get after it tooth and nail.

Confidence boosters for the new college grad

Graduating from college gives you a great feeling and a sense of accomplishment. However, it is usually accompanied by a lurking fear about having to grapple with the nitty-gritty of life that henceforth was not a direct concern. The need for searching suitable job openings for employment to settle down in life looms large. Cutthroat competition, scarce jobs and the prospect of facing tough job interviews shake your confidence. This is where you require boosting your confidence to let you sail through tough situations in your march to success. You may think that only some people have confidence and succeed while others don’t and are doomed to suffer continued disadvantage in life. You cannot be more wrong. The fact is that

10

those who lack confidence can learn to be confident. They can develop their confidence to greater levels that can bring astonishing results to every aspect of their lives. You must understand that confident people do not behave the way they do because they are always secure. They are able to do it because they make preparations. For example, an athlete spends endless hours and energy in practicing to play, actors rehearse lines repeatedly, sales persons stand in front of a mirror for hours to practice their presentation. These are the very principles that apply to building confidence. Keep practicing. Whatever you have to do, there is no better way to develop more confidence than preparation. You may be required to make a presentation or may simply need to project a strong image, however, for every situation you can develop your confidence by making the right preparation. To practice you just need to write down everything, check it again, rewrite and make corrections/improvements, role-play with a friend and practice out loud preferably recording your words. Don’t bother about the time, spend as much time as you find is enough. The aim is to make a solid preparation for whatever you have to do/ situation you have to face. While building up confidence it is important to understand that not all confident people are successful in everything they do. So be prepared that you may also make mistakes or face an embarrassing situation at some time. It is true that mistakes, rejection and embarrassment are painful but they provide valuable information necessary to do something right. So take your mistakes positively and use them to make sure that the next time you are able to do correctly what was wrong the first time. In practical life people are judged by what they do right. Therefore it is right to expect to fail at some time, just make sure that you learn from your failure. Many fresh college grads say they are unable to get a job because employers do not prefer inexperienced applicants. This is why it is as a fresh graduate you must do at least one or if possible, more than one internship. It will be a great confidence booster. It is true that above 90% of employers consider experience a relevant factor in hiring decisions. Out of this more than half prefer experience for new grads to come from co-op programs or internships. You can be confident that your internship will ensure that your prospective employer takes a close look at your resume. The bottom line is that if you feel afraid to face the work world as a new college grad your internships will boost your confidence tremendously and teach you to forge ahead telling you that you can do it.

Don’t compare yourself and get your confidence down

Many-a-time people have this attitude of constant self-comparison. Self-comparison can be dangerous if it turns into negative emotions. It can also be the root cause of self-destruction. It’s a big roadblock towards achieving success. To evaluate yourself with others is circuitously questioning your individual self-worth. Things like I am not so pretty like others, or I am not intelligent like my friends, I will never be able to afford anything in life, etc. can make you feel dejected and your confidence level can go down to no extent. Make sure you respect yourself and think high about you. Every individual is

11

different and no comparison can be made between two people. You need to have the maturity to understand that you are superior and so are your ideas. Once you start thinking in a positive manner, confidence will reflect in your life. You must have heard that the more you tell yourself something, the more you start having faith in it. It can be absolutely anything: positive or negative thoughts. It depends on you, as to how you train your mind. The key is to stay away from negativity and stop comparing yourself with others. Once you achieve doing this you will be brimming with confidence inside you. There are loads of ways to look at things optimistically. Judging yourself with others around you is undoubtedly not so appreciated. You will merely thrive in setting yourself up for a big fall into a pit of stumpy self-esteem. Low self-esteem will simply cloud your individual conviction in yourself. It will splinter the idea of exclusivity into tiny little pieces. Are you constantly comparing yourself with others at your work place? Sometimes such kind of comparisons may lead to damaging your own self-esteem. The problem mainly arrives when your comparisons are colored with your meanings and perceptions. As a result you start feeling contempt towards everyone around you. This can affect your beliefs and behavior. The next point is to analyze if you are comparing with the correct person. Think about this: what is the use if you actually evaluate yourself with the big shots of your company? It’s logical if you strike a comparison with someone among your peers and not with irrelevant set of people Most working people are affected when it’s time for appraisals. A lot of unexpected turns of events happen during performance reviews and annual appraisals. If someone you had not anticipated gets an increased pay hike than you, automatically the strong feeling of comparison and disgust for him/her erupts inside you. This naturally lowers your self-esteem and you lose your confidence and interest to work like before. The bottom line is that comparisons are just groovy as long as there is an element of competition among your peers is present. But if it crosses the prescribed limits things can turn really chaotic for you. Understand the pros and cons of self-comparison. Take the correct choice of distinguishing between things. Self-comparison with others can really damage you. Be positive in your thoughts and actions and show your best at work and put an end to your approach of comparing yourself.

Forget about your fears and start developing your self confidence

Many of us fear rejection or failure even before we attempt to try. Failure is a part of life and one must experience it at least once. However, to fear will only take you away from success. In this competitive world, it is essential for one to overcome their fears and develop selfconfidence. Developing self-confidence may take some time, but it is not impossible to become a confident person. Self-confidence plays a key role in shaping our personality and future. No one is born perfect and all of us learn as we go through life. Some grasp things very fast, while some may take time. If one person is master in one field, another may be good in something else. We all have some skill that can take us ahead in life. We only need to realize it and nurture it accordingly. Fearing failure or rejection before you give your work or skill a try is

12

mere foolishness. It is better to try and fail once or twice, than do nothing at all. Your failures are going to help you learn about your mistakes, and help you give your best every time. Facing failures can be painful and can make you stressed, but they can help you to better yourself and perfect. To develop confidence, you must first learn to accept failure or rejection. By accepting reality, you can either do well or fail, even if you are prepared to take the risk to do your task well. A person who takes risks is certainly a confident human being. There is no success story, if one has not experienced failure. The saying,” failure is a stepping stone towards success” is apt. To develop your self-confidence you need to get rid of all the negative thoughts. Removing negative thoughts and being prepared to face the circumstances is a strong foundation of selfconfidence. Being confident does not mean that you have to forget your limitations. Being able to define your limitations would help you know your strengths and overcome your weaknesses, which is important when for the development of your self-confidence. One important aspect in building self confidence is to stay away from people who have a negative attitude and spend more time with people that think positively. Plan your goals and set a time limit to achieve each goal. If you have some weakness, work on them and you will find achieving success is easy. Achieving every goal will help you boost your confidence and make you a better person. Be open to criticism and take it as feedback. There would be people who will comment on your work. If they are genuine enough, you can learn from their comments or simply ignore them. Do not expect to develop self-confidence in a day’s time. It is a process and takes place gradually. Once you start working on it, you would see the change and feel the difference in your life. Be it your professional or personal life, self-confidence can do wonders. You need to learn to believe in yourself and trust your abilities. Confidence is an important tool when it comes to being successful in life. It takes determination and time to build or regain your selfconfidence. There will be several obstacles when you try to build up your confidence. But, remember nothing can take success away from you if you have no fears, but possess confidence.

Getting rid of confidence crushers

A short time ago it was heard that a revered and highly intellectual person working in a reputed organization had been summoned to address a speech to young management trainees. The gentleman prepared very well and had written a laudable and motivating speech. He was to give a lecture on ‘Public speaking skills’. This was not the first time that he was called upon to give speech. The D-day arrived and he seemed to be in very high spirits. The moment he was introduced to the students, he got up and was about to give his speech when things started becoming hazy in front of his eyes. All of a sudden he was utterly blank and couldn’t reminisce anything he had prepared. After faltering for a few minutes, he walked away feeling utterly embarrassed and shell-shocked by the turn of events. Now, what happened here could be passed on as a common episode. But if you think intensely you will realize that the person was suffering from lack of confidence that has never happened to him on previous occasions. He had done his homework well, yet there can be times when

13

people go berserk just seeing a huge crowd and tend to forget things or become totally nervous. This can happen to any professional speaker and not just amateur ones. If such a situation arises it’s better not to panic. Be calm and think about the reasons. Try attempting to speak again after a few minutes. Start the conversation on a lighter note maybe by cracking a joke or talking about an anecdote from your childhood. Then you may find it comfortable to address the crowd. The main thing that can crush your confidence is low self-esteem. Think high about yourself. Be optimistic in life about everything. You may find a drastic change in your attitude also. Cultivate the habit of speaking a lot with people around you. Don’t have a reserved attitude. Above all don’t have secret fears or nagging doubts about your personality. Try and be among the circle of people who think highly about you. If you are caught in the midst of people who leave no stone unturned to criticize or blame you then you will be paralyzed by lack of confidence. Also remember not to be over confident about things. Make sure that you have an effective balance between the both. Confidence can drastically crush down if you have an egocentric attitude. You should accept your imperfections and work on them rather than thinking very highly about you. Also try not to have any feelings of resentment or guilt about yourself as this can deter your confidence level from growing. If you have this inward feeling of achieving perfection at any cost, it can lead to problems in your level of self-assurance. There is no need for you to be perfect in everything. If you have an ‘I can’t do this’ attitude, then make an effort to change this. Confidence can be crushed if you aren’t able to believe on all the things you can do. Also if you are constantly comparing yourself with other people, it can impede your level of confidence. It’s always easy to have self-assurance, but extremely intricate to regain lost confidence.

Great ways to regain your lost confidence

It is so common for us to be depressed about our failures to perform in our professional and personal lives. We have days where we find ourselves afraid to do the simplest of things and everyone else seems to be far better than us. We may have experiences where a cascade of unexpected happenings pull us down and make us doubt our capabilities. Here are simple tips that may be helpful in regaining one’s confidence. Stop pretending you have or will find answers to all your problems on your own. Do not be ashamed to accept that you are human and have limitations. You may not give this as a reason to your superiors, but to yourself so as to stop doubting. Remember that you are a part of an organization or family because there is something valuable in you. Nothing will break loose or stop if you slow down for a while. Take a break if necessary, but do not rush headlong into your work or responsibilities just to compensate for that. If you hit another roadblock you may lose whatever remaining confidence you had. Gradually raise your tempo to regain confidence. In all probability, you will find even your fiercest critics encouraging you.

14

Maybe being a senior member of a team or family, you are afraid to show your inability to understand certain things. Analyze your problem with your colleague or friend and move forward one step at a time. Make the maximum use of training sessions and informal talking sessions to gain insights into what others think about a similar problem you have. You may get your answers without even asking for anything. Come out of your cocoon and try to be sarcastic about your problems. Have a hearty laugh when the occasion permits. Do not take comments at the workplace personally and mull over it the whole day. You will be the only person remembering and loosing sleep over it. Hurting yourself will not make the problems go away. Maintain a healthy lifestyle and eating habits. Do not miss food or indulge in anything unhealthy just because you are depressed. It will just show others how unstable you are. Listen to your favorite music and if possible sing and dance along as best as you can. You will find yourself at your cheerful best again. Play and do not let go of your “happy hour”. Do not feel guilty about rewarding yourself and indulging in your favorite daily activities. Have healthy relationships with people who matter most and do not let your frustrations affect them. They may have answers and ways about which you never thought of. Ponder about all the “mountains” you have climbed in the past and in retrospect found them to be mole hills, and you will understand the undue importance you attach with your present day difficulties. Lastly, understand that luckily a day has only twenty-four hours and people do have short memories. You will be valued more for your human qualities and not for your abilities like an unfailing robot.

How to condition your mind for success

If you want your life to change significantly in order to achieve the goals that you have set for yourself you need to condition your mind for achieving success. Your journey to success is bound to be exciting and full of achievements, happiness and satisfaction. However, you must not forget that this journey will not be easy and you will also have to encounter lots of obstacles, pitfalls, challenges and failures. If you do not learn to handle your failures you may never be able to reap the reward of achievements in life. Learning to successfully handle failures, setbacks and challenges begins with your approach to everything in life, more particularly little things. You need to condition your mind for approaching everything positively. Conditioning your mind for success requires you to form new habits, which are formed through all the little things you do everyday. You must understand that it is essential to build positive habits, those that improve your life, and getting rid of negative habits that prevent you from achieving your goals. Your mindset is the strongest factor to help you achieve

15

any type of success. You need to create certain goals for yourself that will help you condition your mind to achieve whatever you desire. You need to be specific with respect to what your goal is. You also need to keep measuring your goal from time to time to ascertain that you have achieved it. Always mention your goal in the present or past tense as if has already been achieved. The goal you set needs to be reasonable enough to attain. However, this does not imply that it should be easily attainable. Your goal should make you stretch to achieve it. Assign a specific date to your goal as a deadline for its achievement. For achieving your goal you need to make a plan and take action accordingly. The best way is to write down what you are going to do to achieve your goal and how you are going to do it. You must visualize your goal every day. Be emotional and try to get the feeling you will have when you achieve your goal, what the achievement will mean to you, how you are going to celebrate your achievement etc. Visualize this every morning and evening. The more you visualize, the more you will strive to achieve it. It is going to build a passion within you that will make you give your all for obtaining your goal. These are ways to spur you towards achieving your personal, professional and business life goals. Unless you work everyday on your mindset, your focus and your capabilities for keeping positive you will not find it possible to handle difficult times when they come and the truth is that they do come. When things keep moving forward and according to plans it is easy to remain positive and focused. The key to success is to be able to remain focused and positive even when things are not going as per plan. To master the techniques for doing this you need to practice all what has been discussed above everyday. Keep practicing these techniques and you will find that when you have an intense desire to succeed, your subconscious mind will help you achieve it.

How To Develop An Amazing Self-confidence

Lack of confidence can paralyze your life. It can prevent you from doing great things just because you do not believe in yourself and can turn you into your own enemy. Lack of confidence does not only have a devastating effect on your mind but is also responsible for the way other people treat you. If you are unable to develop the self-confidence you need every aspect of your life gets affected. It affects your education, employment, relationships and social situations. However, it is never too late to recognize this and start working to improve your self-confidence to achieve what you desire in life. If you are able to understand the problems associated with the low level of your self-confidence it will let you better understand the corrective steps you need to take in order to develop your self-confidence to reach higher levels. For example, if you suffer from shyness or fear it indicates a self-confidence problem. It is typical for people with low self-confidence to hide from interacting with others and avoid situations that call for such interactions. However, by making

16

conscious efforts and using correct knowledge needed for rebuilding your self-confidence you can gradually correct this situation. Your mind and your emotions are the tools required for developing your self-confidence and they always remain with you. It is your mind that can eliminate negative emotions like fear and shyness and put you on a track on which you will continue for the rest of your life. First you need to see yourself in a positive light only then will other people see you in the same way. When have confidence in yourself you will earn the confidence of others and command their respect. Mostly your thoughts only are responsible for your low self-confidence. The right way to tackle this problem is to win over negative thoughts with positive thinking. This is a sure shot method for building and governing your self-confidence. Positive thinking is how you can develop yourself in to a much stronger and confident individual. Negative thoughts invariably lead to negative or even unlawful actions whereas positive thinking leads to positive actions. Your positive actions will lead to more positive thinking and result in more positive action. Both positive and negative thinking are ongoing behavioral patterns. But when you are able to develop a positive mindset, you exude confidence and are well on your way to success. The key to developing your self-confidence is to start small. If you begin by doing big things to develop your self-confidence and fail it can have a big negative outcome. So take small steps in the beginning so that even if you fall you do not get hurt too much. Do not make the mistake of developing your self-confidence by yourself. Surround yourself with people who support you and will provide encouragement when things get tough and you start feeling low. Although it is good to have more people in your team even if you have just one person other than you in your team you know you have someone who will encourage and support you. And finally, never quit your efforts even if the results are slow in coming. Just take a firm decision that you will not quit till you develop your self-confidence to the levels you desire no matter how tough things get or how long it takes.

Learn to let go and build back your confidence

Many of us are experiencing “the calm before the storm”. We are under the impression that the present is just a hoax and that our life is yet to begin. We believe that all we had till date were false starts. And when the world sees us half the way we firmly assert that we are at the starting blocks. The rate at which change is happening in this world, one is lead to believe that change is that one sudden, spectacular and irreversible event that everyone takes note of. The need is for us to realize that as always change is still a gradual forward movement and involves a lot of “on” and “off” days. We give into a peer pressure to make change happen and enter a vicious cycle of depression when nothing goes our way. We need to stop pondering over the bad days and failures that are few but noticeable and set our eyes on our successes that are gradual and unnoticeable immediately to the eyes. One needs to “let go” of the paralyzing power of failure. That involves understanding and implementing the need to change. On many occasions we resist change since it can be painful

17

and fraught with a lot of uncertainties. We experience a false sense of security by being static and not taking risks that we know may be necessary. If a child learning to walk decides its better to sit than take the risk of falling down the stairs or in the toilet while walking, it may never walk its entire life. Similarly, one needs to look at failures as our baby steps towards the objective of building a life. Putting behind us the memories and sure signs of failure may not be easy. “Letting go” may require us to set short term goals, which may seem to take us in an entirely new direction. We may be apprehensive of losing sight of our goal and resist such a change. One must realize that every goal achieved, whether short or long term is a step towards boosting our confidence and will add up to the achievement of our objective. Sometimes, incorporating change may make us appear as inconsistent and unsure of are goals. One example may be that of Warren Buffett, who began his business as a newspaper boy and ended up as an investment banker, all the while, unnoticed by the media or business analysts. Developing confidence does not have a straight and simple formula to be implemented. One of the best examples of letting go of the worst events is that of the stock market. The analysis of the daily gains made will show a rather irregular way of growth, while the bigger picture displays a definite and prominent growth over a decade or more. Similarly, we need to look at “off” days as just a passing phenomenon compared to the long stay of slow but steady progress. In our endeavor to achieve progress let us remember progress can “bottom-out” but it has no “top-up”.

Practical ways to boost your self-confidence

People around the globe can probably give you a lot of tips on ways to enhance your selfconfidence. Many-a-time counselling can be impractical or virtually tricky to follow. Straightforward practices to build self-confidence can help you a lot. Practical ways of boosting self-confidence will not only help you physically but also psychologically. The first thing that normally works well for a self-assured person is his/her way of grooming. To have good confidence you need to give importance to your overall personality. Wear good clothes and choose them wisely. People first notice your personality. So it’s necessary that you look your best and feel good all the time. This will naturally boost your confidence level. You should have a good confidence level when you interact with all the people around you. Be empathetic towards your friends, family and others you know very well. Once you understand people then you can easily get along with others and you will have a large network of friends coming to you discussing their problems. This will surely increase your confidence level. Always make an effort and empower yourself with all the knowledge near you – about the world, people around you, your job, etc. if you have a good grasp of happening events then you can strike up a good conversation and will never feel left out. Try not to have an attitude of low selfesteem as it often leads to being more assertive. Always have a positive outlook towards things and it might help you a lot in honing your confidence skills.

18

A personal test for you can be in the form of setting individual goals. When you set yourself certain goals you have a confidence and urge to complete it before the deadline. Setting personal goals can increase your confidence level to great heights. Another way to augment the self-assurance level in you is by trying to accept your mistakes and improving on the same. Nobody in the world is perfect and we learn things in the process of time. Hence, you must understand this concept and learn from your mistakes. This will give you confidence in your future endeavors. If you have a penchant to work on a difficult task, then attempt it. Don’t depend on others to be your redeemer. Once you start doing your things on your own you feel thoroughly motivated and your self-confidence rises tremendously. Also try avoiding a constant comparison between you and others. Constant evaluation can be dangerous. Everyone has a unique personality. Accept the truth of what you are and how you can furthermore improve yourself. This will depict a great result on your confidence level. Attempt and mingle with people who strongly feel good about you. If you have people around you who tend to disparage you or make you feel small all the time, try and avoid them. If you continue being them you will feel start losing your self-esteem gradually. Associate with people who avow who you are. All these practical ways can help boost your morale and you will have the ability to tackle the most difficult situations in life. The next time make sure that you pick up some of these valuable tips.

Procrastination will never make you self-confident

Procrastination is the trepidation of achievement. People mainly procrastinate because they are frightened of the success that they know will occur if they move ahead in life. This attitude is witnessed because success is heavy and you have to carry a lot of responsibility along with it. Therefore, the common phenomenon is that people intend to put off things and just live on. This indifferent approach towards things makes a person lose his/her self-confidence. Delaying things is nothing but failing to live up to your correct potential. There can be many things about you that may be simply incredible. But if you are apathetic in things around you and have a laidback attitude then you are bound to lose your self-confidence. If you lack confidence in yourself then you will be uncertain about almost everything. Selfconfidence is nothing but a strong belief in yourself and your individual abilities even if you have not attempted it before. Procrastination is not just a tool for avoiding humdrum tasks but on a much superior level it is avoiding the ‘huge’ decisions and the ‘big’ actions that can make an actual distinction in your life. Feeling of uncertainty and lack of confidence in you is surely an obstacle on the road to success. Make sure that you don’t question your own capability. On the contrary, if you are filled with confidence, you are sure and certain in your abilities then no doubt you will get a perfect result. Self-confidence is what creates a sense of conviction within you. When you have performed a task before and derived success, you are easily motivated and intend to recreate the magic again.

19

In case you try and procrastinate in your activities, then it’s difficult for you to move ahead in life. Procrastination can pilfer your future and you will not be able to perform the actions you desire. Confident people are mainly those who are action-minded. They are the people who know well that confidence and action go hand-in-hand as one creates the other. There are some people who wake up in their midlife only to realize that they have come a long way and haven’t performed anything worthwhile all these years. In fact they have wasted their time by just procrastinating. They wanted to do many things but somehow kept on putting it of or dilly dallying things. As a result they enter into severe depression. This is called the ‘mid-life crisis’ where people realize late of what they have lost in life. Hence it is advisable that you don’t take things easily and start working on them rather than postponing. Have a level of confidence within yourself that can empower you to take any action. Remember that confidence comes not from physical proof but from a feeling that you can do things in life. Shrug away your doubts and be certain. This is the key factor to be self-confident. In due course procrastination cannot endure in the mind of a confident and action minded person. If you try to stop postponing things then you are sure to climb the ladder of accomplishments soon. Therefore, procrastination can never make you feel self-confident and ruin your gateway to success.

Some quick self confidence boosters

Having to face an interview you so longed, a business appointment or someone special for the first time can really drain out your confidence. As you near the appointed time, you are surprised that you are jittery about facing the very thing that you’ve longed for. You find fault in all the preparations you have made and dread the appointed hour. Similar situations may arise in your workplace or in your personal lives. All humans have an ever-changing nature and body. In the midst of such a dynamic life, maintaining one’s self esteem and confidence is indeed a challenge. May be you could make good use of some advice. Confidence is a relative term and can vary depending on time. Think and act positively even in adverse situations. Maintain your self-esteem and do not indulge in self-degradation even when you may be at fault. Perform a realty check on your confidence levels regularly and find reasons for low selfconfidence. Take positive steps to correct personality disorders or emotional instabilities so as to improve confidence. A confident person is one who has a clear understanding of his weaknesses and takes appropriate actions. A confidant person laughs easily while a secretive and doubtful one pretends to show his emotions. Be assured in life that you deserve the best and expect the best out of all that life has to offer you, and your posture and facial expressions will not betray your ill-founded fears. Exercise regularly to maintain body posture and walk upright, with confident steps, steady eyes and a composed look. In moments of nervousness, simple tricks like breathing deeply and letting your neck and shoulder muscles relax slowly make you composed and improves confidence.

20

A day prior to your D-day, and assuming you have done all the background work for the interview or appointment well in advance, sit down calmly. Go through the requirements and analyze areas where you may not have the right answers. Prepare probable explanations and present them in a positive way. Rather than fretting over an uncertain future, gain confidence from your past achievements. Do not dwell over the all the things that can possibly go wrong. Remember many have been there before you and survived to tell the tale. Learn to look into the eyes of adversity. Maintaining eye contact while having a conversation helps a lot, since it gives an impression of one’s self-confidence. It also helps you gauge the flaws and confidence level of your opponent. Analyzing a situation threadbare and learning from past mistakes can give enough confidence to overcome current obstacles. Prioritizing your goals can help you tackle issues one at a time, without having to loose sleep over trivial matters. May be you have been grappling with issues which are not all that important for you to move forward in life. To gain confidence, begin with goals that you think are achievable. Get involved in activities that can bring out the best in you. You may not be the best business executive, but you may be far better in sports, literature or gaming. Just as a sugar pill may cure an unsuspecting patient, a healthy lifestyle and positive attitude may give one the confidence to dig one’s way out of the most difficult of situations.

The art of staying positive

If you have ever read Norman Vincent Peale’s ‘the power of positive thinking’ you will come across different situations in the author’s life where he has illustrated the need for being positive. Yes, people do say that it’s necessary to have a positive and optimistic approach towards life. The question here is: how do we stay positive in any situation? We human beings have this inborn quality of changing our disposition according to the condition. Well, the main challenge is not to get thwarted in any circumstance in your life. Whenever you feel that things are not happening the way you wanted to, then stay cool and be positive. Every situation has a power to change. So your predicament might be a temporary phenomenon. Hence, don’t be disappointed due to any turn of events. Accept things as they occur, as no force can change what’s intended to happen. During that period you must try to be neutral about the events happening and stay on the positive side. This will truly produce startling results. You should be consistent and be unperturbed in any situation. First, your positive thinking should be based on profound positive belief system. How exactly you should see the world? Do you love yourself? Are you in love with your life? Do you really have a strong faith in good fortune and opportunities coming your way? These thoughts can actually judge your personality and help you understand how positive you think. The art of staying positive can be reinforced with the help of positive actions. If you have solid foundation that you always believe in the best and not in the worst, then it is for sure that you will remain positive all the time. It’s a common propensity to dream about achieving your goals.

21

But, it is necessary that you stay focused on your goal come what may. This kind of an attitude can work wonders for you. To be positive you require diligence and flexibility. Sometimes you will be tempted to turn negative and think all intrusive thoughts. But, the simple formula is to control your mind when you feel negative thoughts is capturing you. Make an effort to practice positive thinking, act on it and you will surely succeed. Negative thoughts can really affect you and shallow down your spirits and gradually you may tend to lose your confidence skills. Start thinking that you can learn from your mistakes and will not repeat the same. Try and overcome your negative emotions. Make sure that you learn new opportunities, grow, love and laugh in life. If people give unenthusiastic feedback about your work, then try and work on it rather than forming a pessimistic impression about the person. This mantra can be very effective in staying positive all the time. Try not to feed yourself with lot of upsetting impressions. This can hurt your self-esteem. Also be among the people who stay positive all the time. Avoid the circle of people who have this constant habit of fretting about everything in life. Most of all is to be happy with whatever you have in life. This can really have a magical impact on your attitude.

The habits of confident people

When you are in awe of a confident person what is the first thing that comes to your mind? Of course their habits, which make them stand apart from the others. Wondering what can be the extraordinary habits of confident people? At the outset, confident people are open to any disparagement or suggestions. They will never have an attitude of ‘I know everything’ in their outlook in life. Every person has his/her share of imperfections. The confident person tries to improve in the point he/she is lacking behind. Also if some suggestions or feedback are given regarding their work, they try and implement the same. In short, they don’t believe in having a self-centered attitude. They have a fair idea about their limits and capabilities. They don’t consider themselves as a multi-faceted personality. Confident people know exactly what are their skills and what they lack in. This honest judgment really proves to be helpful, as self-analyzing makes you understand where you stand in the rat race. They constantly ask people to advice on their work or competence. They even put into practice the input given by others. They make an effort and learn from their mistakes. Every person has flaws or deficiencies in them. But it depends on how they treat their imperfections. The best way to reach the ladder of success is through learning from your mistakes and improving on the same. Confident people set their own realistic goals and above all they have practical expectations. They don’t over exaggerate things. Some people have hopes that are beyond mind’s eye and can never be achieved. It’s always better to stay within limits rather than have a questionable outlook about things.

22

Also, they are ready to work extremely hard to attain their goals. And the incredible part is that, they really are successful in achieving their objectives. When you are totally clear about your goals and how to achieve them, you will surely reap in the benefits. Confident people never try and blame their fate for any untowardly thing that happens. It is a normal tendency of people to hold responsible of others if anything goes wrong in their life. This attitude needs a serious change. Every person is liable for his/her actions and nobody should be unnecessarily blamed. This kind of maturity will help the person to achieve his success. Embracing new-fangled challenges is a well-known habit of confident people. They don’t deter from playing with risks. A confident person will have assurance in himself. Hence, they are ready to take up any challenge and portray their skills to obtain triumph in any thorny situations. Confident people have a very optimistic outlook towards life. Above all, confident people are the cynosure of all eyes. They have all the essential ingredients that can make them the star of any work they undertake. They have undeniable confidence level, charisma, and the power of positive thinking. Also they are highly motivated individuals and always move around with an ‘I CAN DO’ attitude. They are exceedingly strong willed and have great fortitude. It’s true that a person can be well judged by his habits. So now you must have understood the secret of high achievements of confident people!

The Key To Finding Your Inner Confidence

You will come across different types of strategies, thinking patterns, behavior patterns and practical tips aimed at improving your life and generally feeling better about yourself. However, all of them are no good without a strong foundation that is the real ‘you’. There are things that you need to do to find your inner confidence. The first thing is to know yourself and your personal values. They are the most important things you can know about yourself and are vital to finding your real inner confidence. You must know the real values you hold in life. Your values rest deep inside you near the very core of who you really are. They are things within yourself, the world around you, and can include things important to you like family, respect, progress, achievement, freedom and numerous other things. They are the foundations or the building blocks of what you really are. Your values are hardwired into you and will always remain with you whatever may happen. You trust your values because they are there all the time. Notice and understand your values and use them by making choices while keeping them in mind and align your life around them. It will give you a fantastic feeling when you employ this strategy because you will be allowing your inner self to live in real life and will give a boost to your inner confidence. To increase your inner confidence you need to look within yourself instead of looking at the outward signs to know if what you are doing is right. You must see what you are telling yourself. Trust yourself to make great choices. Trust your own insight and use your own intuition. If you make a mistake, you have no one to blame. The fact is that everyone makes mistakes. To be

23

self confident you just need to trust yourself to get through every situation and continue to make choices even if you are wrong at times. This is real self-confidence. Self-confidence will come only by listening to yourself and whatever your intuition tells you. If you listen to yourself it makes it easier for you to trust yourself and go ahead with making decisions and take measures to deal with adverse circumstances with confidence knowing that you are good enough to deal with the matter whatever happens. You can compare confidence to muscles in the body. Muscles need to be exercised or they shrivel and shrink and suffer from atrophy. The same happens with confidence. You must give your confidence a workout. If you do not take decisions then your confidence wanes and you lose confidence. You may be a person who does not take many risks. You do what needs to be done each day but do not stretch yourself and prefer to stay within your safety and comfort zone. This exposes you to fewer risks and you need less confidence for getting along and consequently become less confident. To find your inner confidence you must be prepared to take risks, whether small or big and stretch yourself in a new direction. Try something new, open yourself up to new possibilities that exist around you. When you open yourself more to risk, possibility and opportunity you will need to be more confident and this in turn will let you develop more confidence.

The top secrets to building better confidence

‘Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.’ Perfectly true! Confidence is a key to success. If you have oodles of self-confidence you can face any situation in life. Many people lack good confidence skills. As a result it portrays a negative impact in all their activities. So how do you actually build your confidence? First and foremost, feel good about yourself all the time. Have an optimistic attitude. You have to boost your morale by different means. These boosters should be something that you feel good about in your life. It can be memories of the past or your present growth in career. Think about all the good stuff that you have in life. This automatically makes you feel better and increases your level of confidence. Another way is by talking to your family and friends about things that are special to you. Just a small pep talk from your folks can create a huge difference in your confidence level. The next step is to train your brain for self-confidence. It is essential that you have proper mind control that will help in building good confidence level. Keep the mind free. Don’t load yourself with unwanted issues and tensions. Your thoughts can reflect on your attitude and it can greatly hamper your confidence skills. Many people have this outlook of being self-conscious. Sometimes this can be considered okay. But you need to get over your feeling of being self-conscious. The more you shun away this attitude the more will you have confidence. One thing that we need to understand is that it’s very easy to let go our confidence. But to regain it again is a Herculean task. Hence, don’t try to let your confidence level slip.

24

All you have to do is stay happy, build a robust health and have a high self-esteem. Confidence will surely knock your doorstep. It is not advisable to take immense pressure on your mind and body just for the mere sake of building confidence. Taking on a lot of pressure can bother you and disrupt your approach of being calm. Hence, it’s better to take things easily and move ahead with self-confidence. Another secret of escalating your self-confidence is by sincerely analyzing your strengths and weaknesses. The next step is working on your weaknesses and maximizing your strengths. You should always arm yourself well with good, solid preparation and avail all the opportunities obtainable to perform job and do your best in every possible way you can. Make an effort to shield yourself against any predictable threats that can stop you or slow down your pace. Another essential tool for building confidence is time management. It is utmost important in all your efforts. Train yourself mentally about proper management of time. The better is your study, training and preparation the better you have chances of success and higher self-confidence. Time management is vital for achieving accomplishment in all aspects of life. A person should have adequate confidence level but it should not cross beyond the boundary and turn into over confidence, as it can impede your future growth. Maintain a perfect balance of your confidence skills and hone them from time-to-time.

Walking that thin line between confidence and arrogance

You can often make out a confident person by the way he talks, walks and does all the actions. A confident person believes in his abilities and can face every situation in life. Being successful is not possible without confidence. A confident will always proves his worth through actions. Confidence is a good and essential quality, however overconfidence is not. Being over confident or trying to show your self confidence all the time will make you arrogant. Eventually due to this act everyone would run away from you. You must know the difference between confidence and arrogance and should know where to draw that line. Impressing others is certainly good, but over doing it will make you look dominant and arrogant. Constantly making others realize that you are good with these skills or are far better than the rest is not confidence. Many a time’s people refuse to accept that their overconfidence is being arrogant that can hurt others emotions. Remember there are other self confident people as well who are good and skilled is something or the other. Thus it is good to appreciate others achievements as well. Be ready to share the lime light with others and you would be appreciated and loved too. Talking only about self and telling others stories about your success all the time will not make them feel good about you. Instead let your actions speak about your success and you would be appreciated more. If you simply keep boosting about your work and not prove anything, you would be tagged as an untrustworthy person. People will only make fun of you and call you names. Arrogance is never accepted and one should know to differentiate between confidence and arrogance. If of lately you have observed yourself to be overconfident or being arrogant to others, you can still convert it into self confidence and win back people through your actions. Self confidence is

25

a belief and trust in self for being able to complete a task. Arrogance is talking about how well you will fulfill the given task. You need not speak about your potentials before it is proved. Once you have achieved the desired result, your co – workers or family members are about to see it and appreciate it as well. Arrogance can be an obstacle in your progress, thus it is best to get rid of it. It will bring you neither good will nor better people around you. Learn to shun away from arrogance and behave in a confident manner. A confident person knows what are his strengths and weaknesses and works on the same. If you are confident, you are ready to take the risk and can face failure as well. As you like to be appreciated by others, they too expect the same out of you. Treat others well and let not your confidence turn into arrogance and spoil the relations. It is good to love yourself and be proud about what you are; however making it obvious will create a negative image about you. Being able to walk the thin line between confidence and arrogance will you become successful as well as a better person.

Ways to boost your child’s confidence

Childhood is the most important phase in human life when many of are emotions and abilities are settled for life. A child with self-esteem grows up to be confident. The emotional and mental growth of a child depends on many influencing factors, the most important being the family. In a child’s life parenting attitude matters the most. Every action from the parent should be able to nurture self-esteem in a child, by keeping the end objective of developing a healthy, confident and happy adult, in mind. Encouraging and appreciating positive attitude makes a child confident. Children like to talk in detail about their activities, and are encouraged when appreciated for specific achievements. For this, apart from daily conversations, parents need to set aside time for some pep talk. They may appreciate their behavior at a specific party or even a small act of kindness. From a child’s point of view those are important since they may be the few occasions when the adults noticed him. Treating children as individuals and making them realize the end result of their actions helps in making them good decision makers. Being patient with them and letting them enjoy even trivial things like tying their laces or manipulating a compass develops a sense of achievement in them. Letting them have a say in family matters like painting a room, placing potted plants in the house or buying a dog may help them feel important. Parents should be careful while conversing publicly and privately with their children. Admonishing and sometimes praising a child privately has a greater effect than otherwise. Presenting a child’s weaknesses in a way so as to develop a positive mind set and avoiding judgmental comments helps in boosting its self-confidence. They become resilient, unaffected by peer pressure and are undaunted by criticism or mild teasing and are less likely to be on the defensive when questioned. Children can easily run out of motivation and parents need to think of novel ways to support them and make known their appreciation. This helps in them to set goals for themselves and strive to reach them. They require encouragement specially when taking up new challenges at school or at play.

26

Helping children gradually take control of their daily activities can also help them be more responsible and develop confidence without being arrogant or conceited. By presenting them with opportunities to make choices, like places to hang out or the type of clothes to be worn, children have a sense of achievement and reasoning. Children become assertive but not aggressive in letting known their needs. Emphasizing their strengths and praising their skills can help children focus on their abilities and talents. Making known their special achievements and qualities among close family and friends gives them a sense of belonging. Their abilities in sports or arts can help them appreciate their roles as leaders or team players. A child grows up to be a responsible individual depending on the respect he or she has gained in the family. Hence the interaction of parents with their children has a strong influence on a child’s relationship with others. A sensitive and respectful upbringing will make a child caring, sensitive and respectful of others.

For more useful information on self confidence click here

27